I am sad

I am going to miss this class so much! :(......

They do it too/Abusive Asshole

I've notice a lot of people when they have been talking about the intimacy problem with the ship who sang and not being able to touch is a huge issue they seem to keep bringing up old people and sex. I've noticed people saying "some do" or such like that. Old people do have sex. I know ha ha very funny or ew gross but it's a fact. I know some may have anophobia or a fear of old people and do not want to think about grandma age people having sex or being sexual but why can't they be? Alot of comedy movies lately have been making a joke out of older women having sex and I really do not see the humor in it. Also the media's always emphasizes how important it is to be young and vibrant and how you should hide your age by dying your hair or using wrinkle creams. I know that people have a problem with old men too but there is so much pressure on older women and so much judgement. Post metopause women are treated like they have a disease and are treated with HRT. I honestly see menopause as sort of another right of passage like menarch is. I know this is a little off topic from the readings but I just thought I should point it out and another class I am in has been discussing woman and aging so it just sort of sparked up.

Going back to the readings the ending really sort of confused me. Pallon seems like such a jackass and all the things he says to her like calling her a metal plated retard (or w.e. he says) just makes me so mad. The relationship does not seem healthy to me. He is obsessed with her in a creepy, crazy way. When someone is obsessed with another they ususally end up becoming abusive in different ways and since he obviously can't hit her cause she is a ship (and that would really only hurt him) he does it verbally. I really want to read The Partner Ship to see how this relationship works out.

Required to Donate and Helva's Motherly instincts

It sort of took me back when I read on page 56 that those who had great physical and mental qualities were required to donate their eggs. It did not seem that important in the book but I find this to be a big violation of reproductive rights. There are a lot of people for egg donation and against it and those women should have a right to choose to donate or not to donate. It's also almost genecide of for lack of a better word stupid or ugly people. It reminded me of that Harvard graduate trying to sell her eggs for thousands of dollars because she knew people would want her "smart" genes. It also made me think of how women can now abort pregnancies if the child is going to be deformed or even if the child is not going to be the gender they wanted. I just do not think this is fair. I understand that raising a child who is disabled or diformed is hard to deal with but that is the egg that was chosen to recieve life. I'm not really all for one side of the issue or the other but I just feel imperfections is the way of nature and everyone coming out "normal" or "smart" would just make the world boring. Imperfection can be more beautiful than perfection.

I also noticed on page 61 how once again a female character is showing motherly instincts. Even though Helva is incapable of having children (or is she?) she still wants to protect the donated eggs at all cost like they are her own. She also felt close to them in a strange way because they were encapsaled just like she was, obviously not forever though like her.

I was very happy when Helva gave Kira an idea of how she could have children with her beloved, lost husband. When Kira turns around and says that Helva could do the same thing with her mother's eggs and Jennan's father's sperm this confused me. She is a ship... could she be able to raise a child? This just blew my mind with so many questions and possibilities... I would rather not look to much into it but wow was that a strange thing to suggest!

Diamond Age Drummers and other things

The idea of the Drummers is really complicated and I am not sure what exactly is going on. They sound like a very sick bunch of people that are acting out on their subconciouse desires or have no control over their id. He seemed to have no control over his impulses and/or sexual desire. Why would the nanosites effect him in this way? I do not understand the significance. I understand that they are transmitted from person to person through intercourse but why and how is the person "dreaming" through out this?
I did not like how the  book jumped ten years into the future at random. I wanted to see Nell grow up with the Primer more. I feel like I do not know her anymore. It was also strange to me how she was right around the same place in the Primer she was ten years ago collecting the keys that had been stolen and the final key. What else has she learned from the Primer in the time that was not talked about then? I remember she did backtrack to go back to the Dojo and learn more but for ten years? Highly doubt that. I thought she would be in a different story by now or something. I just do not like how quickly time has past and I feel I am left out of whatever happened to her during those ten years.
I am not sure what Nell is planning on doing with her life. I have not read up to the part she gets her fortune or whatever it is yet. I just do not see a place for her in the society she is in right now. She is not conforming or rebelling so what is the medium of that or outside of it? I found it quite funny that when she left she put on a shirt that said SHIT HAPPENS so she could blend in lol.

Awsome, Mysterious Ending

I really enjoyed the ending of this novel! Somethings confused me a little bit though. What actually happen to her father? Did he just become old and senile? I really thought that she should have killed him. He deserved to die a slow, horrible death. I expected Ash to jump up and bite him in the jugular or just tare him to pieces. I really liked how the ending really made this more of a sci-fi book to me. The Moon women visiting her was definately a fantasy scene in the book but it could be interpreted as just a dream. The dress and Ash's hair growing long was not too big of a deal to me. In the end though, she became a glowing, supernatural being. The blood really freaked me out and I was not completely sure of the meaning behind the blood that came out of her palm. When the blood flowed between her legs it made sense for obviouse reasons. It represented her loss of her virginity. Which reminds me it bothered me how out of no where the author goes into how in the future it is some kind of oracle because it took me away from what was going on in the present. I was also confused as to why she became two seperate people. The more beautiful one was the one that disapeared. I thought maybe she represented Lissar's anguish and shame for what had happened to her and she disapeared so Lissar could move on. Why was she the more beautiful figure though? I love this whole part of the book but there are so many things I am confused about and are very mysterious. I will definately have to read it again and try to make more sense of it. Hopefully in class today we will go over this a bit, but I know there will also be a lot of questions about " Laugh of the Medusa."

This Can't End Well

When the woman knelt down at Lissar's feet I was a little worried. I thought that maybe someone had recognized her as the princess or thought she was her mother. I had a flash back of the women falling at the queens feet close to the beginning of the novel. There are so many events that spark Lissar's memory of her former life and I keep thinking that it's going to be the moment that it all comes back to her. I do not know how someone can repress a memory that well. I know that this is a fairytale and the Moonlady gave her the ability to surpress the memory as a gift but this happens can happen in the real world as well. I do not understand how this can happen though. I googled repressed memory and found out that some psychologists do not believe that people can repress there memories. I do believe that they exist but I also know that through hypnosis false repressed memories can be brought up and made to believe. I just hope that Lissar never remembers what happened to her. I know that stories do not always have the "lived happily ever after" ending but I just do not want to see her go through that. I am really attached to the character we are reading about, sadly. I just don't see how this story can have resolution with her memory returning. I know that Prof. Hager said the king will get what is coming to him in the end but that does not change what happen to Lissar and she will never forget it. You can not repress a memory twice... well corection cause Lissar did, but she can't conveniently repress it a third time. I just do not see this story ending well at this time. But then again, it can't have a worse ending than Donkeyskin.

Defend Yourself!

I know a lot happened in the last few chapters we read but for some reason one comment Katsa made in chapter thirty-three really stuck out to me. While thinking about teaching Bitterblue how to fight she brings up, "How absurd it was that in all seven kingdoms, the weakest and most funerable of people- girls and women- went unarmed and were taught nothing of fighting, while the strong were trained to the highest reaches of their skill" (398). I thought about how this reflected in reality. Boys are brought up to know how to defend themselves or how to fight and girls are not taught to do so. Protection is not emphasized for girls. I never thought to know how to defend myself until I had a forieng exchange student living in my house named Jazzy. She was my older German sister. She asked me one day if I would know how to protect myself if I ever had to. I had no idea. She confessed to me that she had been raped when she was younger and that she did not know how to fight back. She did not want this to ever happen to me and taught me how to break someones nose if I were ever attacked. It seems that women do not even think about learning how to defend themselves until it's to late and they become victums of assault. If you live in a bad neighborhood then you are usually taught early on how to defend yourself, by learning defensive fighting skills or carrying mase, but those who live in peaceful neighborhoods are usually not taught. The horrors in the world are swept under the rug by parents and ignored to protect a child's innocence. When the horrors of the world become a reality for that untaught child they have no idea what to do and are defenseless. I think more young girls should be taught at an early age how to defend themselves but how to make this a reality is lost to me.  People want to protect their children and keep them boxed. This will never change. I googled to see what sort of things popped up and there are a lot of tips on how to defend yourself against a predator. One good site: http://ezinearticles.com/?Self-Defense-For-Teen-Age-Girls-and-Young-Women-When-You-Have-to-Fight-Off-a-Sexual-Attacker!&id=2494663 Check it out! Learn how to defend yourself even though your not Graced to do so! It's a bit over dramatic but understandable with such a seriouse topic.

Kat and Po: The Perfect Team

Katsa feels that she is infieor to Po because he has so much control over his thoughts. She seems to have forgotten that in just a few chapters before this she controls her rage and thinks clearly before acting out. She hates her uncle and wants to kill, but she thinks of all the consequences of killing her uncle and fights off the rage that is trying to take over. Po had spoken to her before her encounter with Randa and he told her that she has power over what she does. With out Po's words who knows what might have happened. He is helping her see what has to be done to control her anger but she alone is the only one who can actually make it happen and she did a great job. Po needs Katsa help as well though. He has clear thoughts of his suroundings but needs to learn how to act. Their fighting is helping him become quick with his thoughts and actions together. Katsa and Po make really great team, helping eachother out to strengthen their control over their Graces. One has power physically and the other mentally but with help from one another they will both have equal strengths. This sort of seems oposite to how men and women are. Usually it's the women that has the mental power and the man that has physical power. This novel is definately a twist on the norm.

Marriage and Mind Reading

When Giddon proposes to Kat he makes it seem like it is only for her protection and does not bring up once the fact that he is in love with her. It sounds more like a plan of action than an act of love.I know either way Kat would have said no but Giddon should have shown more affection. Giddon always has been rude to her and I know he meant it in more of a flirting way but if he had taken the time to show his affection Kat would have most likely warmed up to him by now and could even love him more than just in a friendship way. He also does not do to much for his cause by mocking Katsa for being different because of her Grace and liking Po. He call Po dishonorable and no better than a thug.

Calling him a thug made Katsa realize that Po is a mindreader because he used these exact words to describe how Giddon felt about him. She feels he has lied to her about his Grace. Why does Katsa feel so hostile toward him mindreaders? I understand that she is afraid of people knowing what she is thinking but since those who can read minds are Graced also they know where she is coming from with her thoughts of being different. Po also is Graced with fighting skills and can understand how hard it is for her to control her anger and aggression. Katsa can learn alot from Po and the fact that he can read her mind can only help him help her more. She needs to let go of being a lone wolf and let someone like Po into her life.

Nice Try Girlfriend

When Genly's crew came out of the ship he sees them as almost alien like. "They were like a troupe of great, strange animals, of two different species..." he says (202). It is almost as if he has forgotten gender all together. When did this happen? Through out the entire novel he talks about when people on Winter are acting like women. In just a few chapters before this when Estraven speaks of how he loves his country he explains that to love one's country should not mean to hate the other. Genly does not like this idea and says that there was something femine in his attitude, "a submissiveness to the given" (146). This is a typical stereo type given to women. That they are ignorant of their surroundings and usually just let things slide. He obviously still has the same idea of women as he did before he came to this planet. Not only did his perception of women's thinking not change too much during this journey but also his idea of a women's image. He speaks about how he is frustated during the journey across the ice because Estraven can not keep up with his pace. The reasoning behind this Genly explains is because, "He was a head shorter than I and built more like a women than a man, more fat than muscle..." (150). Once again Genly is using a typical female stereotype. He is pretty much saying that Estravan pushes the sled like a girl and I am a fulfledged man and can do better, a "stallion." When he thinks of how a women looks he does not picture GI Joe. He sees what people gernerally see, curves not muscles, when he thinks of women. He would definately eat his words if he met Katsa from Graceling...

The ships landing was not too long after the journey. There is no possible way he suddenly forgot about male and female differences convinetly near the end of the novel. His sudden epiphany of how we seem like two difference species compared to the genderless people of Winter was so out of place. I know Le Guin was trying to some what tye up the novel with the character's realization of this but it just does not work. The differences between males and females never once left Genly's mind on Winter.

Confusion with Vowing Kemmering

In chapter eight they explain what kemmering is and vowing kemmering. It says that once you vow kemmer you can not vow with anyone else after death or divorce. Does this mean that after your kemmer is gone you can not have relations with anyone else? Is that it for kemmering for that person? I did read in the chapter before this that Estraven had vowed  kemmer and his kemmer died. He then had Ashe as his kemmer. He even bore children with him. He said that their vow was a false vow because it was a second vow but he had still made a vow to Ashe. Are the rules of Karhide starting to bend? I am sure the vow that they spoke of was not known and kept secretive but they still made a vow. They obviousley love eachother and have feelings past kemmering. Where does the boundries of this rule of vowing kemmering lie? The investigator who wrote the field notes in chapter eight had been to Karhide decades before Genry, maybe now the regulations of vowing kimmering are more lose? I know the people of Karhide follow or seem to follow all rules and regulations very closely in fear of being exiled, but are some of the old ways of Karhide starting to become obsolete slowly but surely? Or have the morals behind vowing kemmering never really been followed as much as they say? I am just trying to figure out if a revolution is on its way with vowing kemmering.